Sep 4, 2013

Shame on me.

I took a break.
From everything.

At least I tried.
It´s always so hard for me to come back home.
Everything stresses me out.
I try to take a break.
But I´m still working all the time.
And then I try to make time to see everyone.
It´s impossible.
So that even adds more stress.
I don´t want anyone to be disappointed with me.
So I get sad.
And depressed.
I had to decide to try to have a real break.
I wan´t to do whatever I wanna do.
Whenever I want too.
I just can´t make plans.
This is the time where I can have total control of what I do.
And I need ME-time.

And I really need to turn off my phone sometimes.
I wake up to it vibrating constantly.
Even if it sometimes has just been friends texting me.
It´s been stressing me.
I hope these aren´t the signs of burn out.
I got into a lockdown mode for a few days.
But I´m ok now.
I guess this is the phase.

You are excited to come home.
You get home.
You´re an emotional wreck.
You don´t know what to do with yourself.
You don´t feel like yourself.
You start doing things.
Seeing people.
You start to feel like yourself again.
You become a happier person again.
You leave.
Bye Bye.


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